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Resentment can be overcome by forgiveness

My heart was filled with deep resentment from the hurt I experienced in the past. I resented the ones who were supposed to protect me, but failed me. I grieved over the lack of relationships that were meant to show me what love and forgiveness looked like.

Left with shattered hopes—fearing that I could never reclaim the losses that I experienced—I had to wonder… was I meant to live with resentment my whole life? 

I don’t know about you, but these feelings were eating me up inside. If I didn’t let go of my hurt, then I knew I would not be able to let go of my resentment. 

My heart ached, thinking about the ways I was hurt; the resentment was just hurting me more. It didn’t seem to be affecting anyone else but me, and I didn’t want to live this way anymore. 

I needed help to let go of my resentment, and I knew the only place to turn was to God. I prayed and searched his word for answers to help, because I couldn’t bear another day of carrying these feelings anymore. 

In Ephesians 4:32 (NIV), we read “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” 

Through God’s word, he showed me that in order to let go of my resentment I needed to forgive. I needed to forgive for the ways I was hurt. 

Knowing that you are continually forgiven is vital to forgiving others.

I needed to know and remember that he had forgiven me of my wrongdoings time after time. Holding on to the resentment would force me to continue to walk in my hurt and not out of it. 

I deeply wanted to let go of the hurt and I am sure you do too.

I needed to let God’s love cover those hurts and comfort the pain. You can let God take away your hurt too. You can do this by surrendering the hurts to him, and letting him walk through the pain with you. That then allows your heart to be softened to forgive, because his love is what our hearts need in order to release the pain. 

It replaces that pain, and it’s the only thing that can. His love and the compassion that he shows us can take the pain away from the past and allow you to forgive… if you let it. 

Knowing that you are continually forgiven is vital to forgiving others. When you understand the kindness and compassion that he has shown you in your sins, then you in turn can reciprocate forgiveness to others. It penetrates your heart to want to forgive and this sacrifice on your part will not be hard when he changes your heart. 

The compassion and kindness that he has shown you is like no other; it causes us to react in ways to others that we didn’t think were possible. 

Forgiveness was the answer for me, and it can also be the answer for you to let go of your resentment. 

Let God’s love change your heart to see past your hurts and to see others the way he sees them: as loved. 

It’s possible for you to have a changed perspective for someone who has hurt you deeply. You just have to open your heart up to his love and then forgiveness will be possible.

  • Are you struggling with resentment against someone?
  • How can you surrender your hurt to God in order to forgive?


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  1. Lila on March 11, 2021 at 1:59 PM

    Yes! I love that quote: “Knowing you are continually forgiven is vital to forgiving others.” It reminds me of the parable of the unforgiving servant. He had just been forgiven of a huge debt greater than he could ever repay, but he didn’t have mercy on his fellow servant who only owed him $20! I don’t want to be like that.

    • Nikki Evanson on March 11, 2021 at 8:41 PM

      Thank you Lila and Amen, I so agree. It’s so important to have a forgiving heart. Thank you so much for sharing and your words of wisdom!

  2. Donna Miller on March 11, 2021 at 2:53 PM

    This is so beautiful Nikki! I went through something very similar. I love where you said, “That then allows your heart to be softened to forgive, because his love is what our hearts need in order to release the pain.”

    I think people don’t understand that God Himself helps us to forgive. I pray that many people who need this message will find your post. And I am believing God will bring them to read this!

    Be blessed sweet sister! ❤

    • Nikki Evanson on March 11, 2021 at 8:49 PM

      Thank you so much Donna! Your words encouraged my heart so much!

      Thank you for sharing your personal experience with forgiving. Yes God’s love softens our hearts to forgive. We need it so much as it’s not easy. Thank you for your prayers and I am praying the same.

      May God continue to bless you as well! Thank you again!

  3. Rochelle on March 13, 2021 at 5:19 AM

    I’m late to the game, Nikki, because I couldn’t read this when it was emailed out to me. Some past hurt had just been freshly revealed to me again…and I was struggling with it. Your post was probably exactly what I should’ve read, but just couldn’t. So, I am now….when my feelings aren’t as strong and I am back to forgiveness. I have a couple of situations that have happened in the past that I have to continue handing over to God. I have forgiven, but I haven’t forgotten. That’s my struggle. Thank you for this timely post!

    • Nikki Evanson on March 13, 2021 at 7:34 PM

      Rochelle, I am happy to hear that the post met you at a time when needed. Thank you for sharing your struggle and please know you are not alone. It is hard to lay down a hurt and not pick it up sometimes. I can struggle with this as well. I am so thankful God is always with us and journeying with us in these places we are hurt. We have such a great God. Thanks again for sharing. So happy we can encourage each other in our journeys.

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Nikki Evanson

Hi, I'm Nikki

My goal is to help and equip Christian women like you to live for Jesus by following Matthew 22:37-39: to love God, to love yourself, and to love others.

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